Date : Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Time : 1:03 PM
Title : two hands to clap

what if, only one friend is putting in the effort to
remain in contact with other,
maintain and keep the friendship going,
and yet the others don't seem to reciprocal.

Is the effort from one party enough
to ensure the continual survival of the friendship?

Labels: and so i wonder, PRIVATEspeech, RANDOM

Date :
Time : 12:02 PM
Title : spare a little time each day and . . .

i've decided to try and spare a little time each day to do some things. (:

(1) i want to spare a little time to update my daily happenings, and thoughts here.
I have feelings for this blog. I can't bear to leave it alone, and let it rot. =X
another reason is that i enjoy reading my friends' blogs, knowing about the happenings in their lives, and their thoughts. well, that's one way to catch up with their latest "news" isn't it?
So people, i didn't leave comment doesn't mean i didn't read your blog. ;)

(2) i want to spare a little time and read up my lecture notes.
It's hard to start such a habit. But I would try? Well, at least read one page better than nothing right? :D damn! know what i am actually thinking?! im thinking that, "everyday also have lecture, of course will read the notes." haha! well, i will try my best to at least read them, after or before the lecture each day. (: WENDY YOU BETTER DO IT!

(3) i want to spare a little time and listen to my favorite songs, and relax (that means not to do anything). Guess everyone need to relax a little each day right? If not will overstress? (: or at least do something i enjoy and will relax myself.

I hope I could think of more things. (:

- - - - -

Some random thoughts about Wendy, today.
I dislike the Wendy today.
Just because i'm having cramps,
i didn't contribute a single thing to the project discussion!
yeah. i tried to think of something! honest!
the cramp is irritating, and i wonder why ideas flow that fast for the others, and not for me. :\ whatever i seem to think of, they will say it out before me. why huh?
should have more breakfasts and healthier meals!
so i will have more nourished brain to function better! haha! =X
but well, i seriously feel so bad about myself.
i told myself that i couldn't do this cos nobody will like a free-rider as a group mate!

come on wendy! you can do better than this!

- - - - -

& im already nervous for my presentation, next wednesday. ):

Labels: and so i wonder, PRIVATEspeech, RANDOM

Date : Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Time : 2:16 PM
Title : undescripable feelings

checked the dates for my exams.
and, i came to realize that the first paper is in 3 weeks time.
the greatest thing is, i haven't start my revision.
how wonderful is it, when i did so badly for my midterm quizzes.

22 April - Developmental Psychology (1pm to 3.30pm)

27 April - Social Psychology (9am to 11.30am)

29 April - Fictional Film : From Hollywood to Bollywood (5pm to 7pm)
Honestly, I HATE THIS TIMESLOT! -.-"

30 April - Research Designs and Data Analysis, basically it's statistics (2.30pm to 5pm)

I don't quite like the time table.
What's with the 5 days gap, then putting other 3 papers so close to each other?!
But well, nothing I can do.

This made me realize that it's TIME TO START.

- - - - -

1 learning journal (due this fri)
1 presentation (due 07 April) im seriously nervous about this!
1 research summary (due 16 April)
1 Statistics Group Project (due 19 April)

I don't understand why NTU functions this way.
There is actually assignment due just 3 days before the first paper,
and there's kind of no study week at all.
im so not getting use to such stressful life.

- - - - -

KEEP HOLDING ON!

Labels: and so i wonder, PRIVATEspeech, RANDOM

Date : Sunday, March 28, 2010
Time : 10:38 PM
Title : Random Thoughts

Thanks alot for the concern. (:
- Xiaofong and Ziqi (& whoever read-ed the previous entry)

I am really touched that you girls read my blog,
and showed concern, giving me words of advices,
and of course sharing your experiences and feelings. (:
this is one of the things that make you girls so special in my heart.
and of course those who read-ed, and show concern in some other ways.
I appreciate all these love and care,
& im really smiling from the bottom of my heart,
cos im fortunate to have such great soulmates like you girls.

- - - - -

did i mention that i did really badly for the mid-term quizzes?
yeah. so bad that im really so disappointed in myself.
im not achieving like how i did back in poly days.
in poly days, im aim for an Ace for assignments and all,
now, im just aiming for a pass or a slightly more decent grade.
i don't dare to look forward to any Ace anymore.

i don't usually like to share my results with people,
be it good or bad, unless someone closed to me asked.
im going to announce here in my blog that im really unhappy with my GPA last semester,
and im super disappointed in my grades for this mid-term quizzes.
doing a downward comparison to people (from JC) who did not do very well,
or did not achieve a higher GPA than me is not going to make myself improve.
it's their business that they are not achieving, and i should not slack cos they are worse than me. im always telling myself that there are far more people in the class, in the course, in the school that are doing far better than me. with my current achievements, i would graduate with a useless piece of degree cert, and ended up getting a job with my diploma only.
isn't this a waste of time, a waste of money, especially when i know financially my family is struggling to pay for the fees?

i promised myself that im going to work doubly or triply hard this semester,
i must pull up my GPA. but all these results are pulling my motivation down.
im not enjoying school at all now, this is really bad.
my interest seems to be dying away because of this.
i have to stop this. i must stop this.
i do like the friends i have now, somehow, i still prefer to be alone at times.
i don't feel this way when im with friends outside of uni. why?

seriously, im losing myself.
and i hate this.
note that it's HATE, not only dislike.

Labels: and so i wonder, PRIVATEspeech, RANDOM

Date : Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Time : 10:24 PM
Title : Can I Just Be A Little Selfish?

Labels: and so i wonder, PRIVATEspeech, RANDOM

Date : Sunday, March 21, 2010
Time : 10:31 PM
Title : Parental Love

Watched "The Kidnapper".
A Local Movie, a nice one. (:
- - - - -

Parents' love for their children is beyond what words could describe.
The movie really make me realize how much our parents love each of us.

I bet all parents will understand the feelings of the dad,
and why he did all things, just to get his son back home.

Simple plot, yet it shows so much about parental love.

Labels: and so i wonder, PRIVATEspeech, RANDOM

Date : Thursday, March 18, 2010
Time : 11:37 PM
Title : Isolation from the World

Sometimes I just wish I could
plug the earpiece into my ears,
on to the volume which I can't hear anything
other than the songs I am playing.

Sometimes, I just want to isolate myself from the surrounding,
and be drowned in the lyrics of the songs.
I enjoy that feeling. (:

P.S. I sound kind of autistic eh?

Labels: and so i wonder, PRIVATEspeech, spell L-O-V-E